Wednesday 24 April 2013

ARE YOU NFIT TO DRIVE ON THE STREETS OF ASIA?


ARE YOU FIT TO DRIVE ON THE STREETS OF ASIA?

Take this sample Asian Driving Licence Test to find out. (Time limit 30 minutes. Or more if you need it.)
1.       When you see a red light…
a)      stop
b)      stop, except if you are on a bicycle, in a hurry, pushing your mobile noodle stand, or it’s raining
c)       ignore it

2.       Give way to…
a)      vehicles on the right
b)      vehicles bigger and faster than yours
c)       nobody

3.       If you are involved in a collision…
a)      buggar off fast
b)      wait for the police
c)       exchange blows with the other driver

4.       Always drive on the correct side of the road, except if…
a)      you are in a hurry
b)      you’re not in the mood
c)       it doesn’t suit you

5.       When taking the Motorbike Licence Practical Test, you will be automatically disqualified if you…
a)      fall off
b)      don’t fall off
c)       collide with two or more other bikes

6.       When driving a car, it is permitted to…
a)      force all motorbikes to give way to you    YES/NO
b)      carry upwards of ten passengers, providing they fit in   YES/NO
c)       cut across lanes without signalling     YES/NO
d)      There are no restrictions    YES/NO

 

HOW DID YOU SCORE?

ANSWERS:
1.       b
2.       b
3.       a or c
4.       c
5.       A trick question. There is no way that you will be disqualified if you have paid the required fee.

6.       a)  Y
b)  Y
c)  Y
d)  N

If you answered all questions incorrectly, don’t despair. There are still three options open to you. You can (a) pay an increased fee, (b) send your brother to take the test for you the following week, or (c) ask any relative who holds an army rank above private, or holds a government position, to intervene on your behalf.

HAPPY DRIVING

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In my new book, EFL minus the B.S. (now available on Amazon) I have touched on this theme, along with many others. In the book you’ll find answers to these questions: How can I get an overseas English-teaching job? Why in the hell would I want to get an overseas teaching job? How can I survive that job once I’ve got it?

1 comment:

  1. Some readers may take your Sample Test as a spoof, but let me assure them it isn't. I recently did a written Driving Licence
    Test in Jakarta, and it was just as laughable.

    ReplyDelete